Mizuno Ami’s Journal

There have been some bad things going on lately, some a lot worse than others. I didn’t transfer schools, which is a good thing. I did some things perhaps I shouldn’t, but things have worked out.

I felt bad, being so worried about something as a school transfer, when Rei-chan had such deeper problems with her father. She and I spent some time together at CROWN, when neither of us wanted to go home, and we sorted out a lot of things. It was fun to spend time with her, I think it did both of us some good, as she points out we both tend to be pulled in, for different reasons. She couldn’t understand why I couldn’t just stand up to my mother in the first place and tell her ‘no’ this is something Rei has little problem with. She has such courage. I worry. I did not want to disappoint my mother, she expects for me to follow her footsteps, and I wish to please her, so I worry that she will hate me if I don’t live up to her expectations, such is the way things are.
Plus, I don’t want to lie to her, but I also don’t want to put her and my other friends in danger by explaining certain things.

As it stands now, she’s had another trip since then, and come back, and she understands that I like to spend time with my friends, and there are certain things I have to do, and that I’m still trying my best, and still doing okay, so it’s alright. Which is a big relief.

Other things have happened though, that make all the fracas over the school issues seem like nothing; and they involve Usagi-chan and Chiba-kun. As it is right now Usagi-chan has disappeared, for a while Luna had me pretending to be her, which worked out okay, suprisingly because Ikuko-mama-san had lost her contact lenses and couldn’t tell that it was me and not Usagi-chan. Right now Mako-chan is in my place and I have to look around for Usagi-chan and try and find out where she’s gone. Rei-chan has gone to see Aino-san for more information.

As to why–why has Usagi-chan disappeared? I have no actual idea. I have speculations only.
She and Chiba-kun were doing very well with their relationship, but then, Beryl…

Beryl appeared and she threatened the lives of the shittenou. She even stabbed Nephrite, or had him stab himself, because of this manipulation Chiba-kun agreed to go with her to preserve the lives of everyone else. He didn’t want Usagi-chan to continue to be controlled by the princess aspect of herself, her other self, self from the past…so, he brought her back to normal and went along with Beryl.
Speculation is that during the night after that the princess came to the forefront of Usagi’s personality again and is now dragging her somewhere around Tokyo, and the only clue we have is the sound of the harp…

Anyway, I should go. I just had to purge some of this out of my head so I could think more clearly and continue my pursuit.
Wish me luck.

Mama-san wants me to transfer schools.

I’m at a loss.
I can’t. I can’t. I can’t.

Yet I can’t give a satisfactory explanation for why not, or why I’ve missed cram school, or what I was doing that the policeman found us.

What am I going to do?

Edit: On the one hand maybe she would send me to Rei-chan’s school. It is a private school…

Mama-san texted me and says she wants to meet me. This can’t be good. She’s at work for two days straight because of something, I don’t know what, and yet she wants to meet with me now, rather than waiting until she’s got through all her shifts and had rest. I’m so nervous.

I think it probably has to do with what happened last night…which was that when I got to the spot where the latest youma had appeared, Rei-chan had already vanquished it and returned to civilian, and as I was congratulating her on this a policeman showed up.
This, of course, is not good, especially as we couldn’t say, ‘Oh, it’s okay officer, you see we’re senshi and we were saving a lot of people from being turned into batteries…’ I hadn’t even had to become Mercury, and Rei had just turned back. Of all the times to wish it actually hadn’t been over so quickly, and I had to participate in the battle…although if that was the case the officer might have been hurt.
We tried to explain, but really, what can you say? We took a short cut home from school this way at almost midnight?
He asked us for our information, and I was hoping that with Mama being at the hospital perhaps they wouldn’t have been able to get hold of her, or would have just left a message at home that I could erase, but perhaps they did both.
I try to tell myself that I’m doing my normal think about this too much; that really nothing is going to happen. She perhaps just wants to see me, given we’ve spent so little time together lately, but I’m afraid that will not be so. Maybe she’s just found out that I’ve not gone to cram school as much as usual, with well, being evil, and being so busy, and that’s just it, and the police haven’t talked to her at all. Although that might be worse, because my doing well means so much to her.

Either way you look at it I’ve let her down.

Well, wish me luck. I’ll go to see her right after classes are done.

In what could be considered mixed news, by which I mean both good and bad, Usagi and Mamoru are together, that is, in a relationship. Luna is extremely unhappy about this, but we sided with her, with Usagi-chan I mean.
I’d like to believe that our destiny is not written entirely by things that have happened in a previous existence we can’t even fully remember. Surely, if Usagi and Mamoru are aware of what happened before they can make sure it doesn’t happen again. So many other circumstances are different for them, surely that can make a difference?